- Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
- Chuck Norris counted to infinity—twice.
- The chief export of Chuck Norris is Pain.
- Chuck Norris doesn’t read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
- When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
- Chuck Norris can lead a horse to water AND make it drink.
- When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn’t lifting himself up, he’s pushing the Earth down.